Free Women's Self Defense Seminar

[brianspinaltap]

Max - The article I linked to is very long and repeats itself a lot, but the general thing I picked up from it is that the main threat to women is not being attacked by stranger in a dark alley, but being manipulated into something 'bad' or a bad situation by a man they already know - who may be a family member, friend or even martial arts instructor. No BJJ technique will save her here, we're in the realm of psychology and the mind, and dealing with predators and their manipulative behaviours, the expectations of society on females, etc..... I don't know how you teach defence to that in a jiujitsu seminar...

Jessica - good point that the article never mentions at any time that the student has a responsibility to own the material, rather than just take everything the martial arts instructor tells them as gospel. The modern trend is to avoid "victim blaming" in our response to sexual assaults - i.e. "why tell women to be more careful, why not just teach men not to rape!". This is a valid response to daft things people say like "she asked for it because she was drunk", however the flip side of this is that the pendulum has swung too far the other way and it's no longer socially unacceptable (on the Internet at least) to say that people should assume any responsibility for their own behaviour at all. Fact is, if you keep doing risky things, bad things will happen eventually. There needs to be more balance in respect to personal responsibility vs not blaming the victim. Hope that gives you some ideas for your seminar

[maxmarkov]

Max - The article I linked to is very long and repeats itself a lot, but the general thing I picked up from it is that the main threat to women is not being attacked by stranger in a dark alley, but being manipulated into something 'bad' or a bad situation by a man they already know - who may be a family member, friend or even martial arts instructor.

Oh, I know and I agree with the main arguments in that article. But as you indicate yourself...

No BJJ technique will save her here, we're in the realm of psychology and the mind, and dealing with predators and their manipulative behaviours, the expectations of society on females, etc..... I don't know how you teach defence to that in a jiujitsu seminar...

... to understand and teach those aspects better you'd need the help of psychology. But since Jessica said ...

I am a pre-law student I want to practice law for the United States Marine Corps then run for District Attorney in the Sex Crimes Unit because helping rape victims is my passion.

... and called it a ...

Women's Self Defense Seminar

... instead of a pure BJJ seminar, she'll eventually have to work all of that into it anyway.

On one side women would have to be taught how to "read signals", how to tell, to some degree, the intentions and tricks of men in their personal environment. They'd also have to be taught what they can do in such situations, who they can ask for help, where to report them, things like that. Reporting your boss for example can often backfire if you report him to the wrong people at the wrong time.

On the other side men would have to be better educated aswell. We tend to think that we are "civilized" in the west and that women are treated better here, which is certainly the case in comparison to other places, but "better" isn't good enough yet. If someone's boss can sexually harass women with relatively little consequences, there's still a lot that has to change. People's attitudes, assumptions and expectations have to change.

[Eddie Bravo]

welcome to the family

[Jessica Doke]

welcome to the family

Thank you! Being part of 10th Planet makes me feel proud. Love everything you guys are doing.

[Robbie Carter]

Jessica, I love your idea! Something I've thought about for awhile now but haven't brought up to my instructor (mainly because I'm a white belt) would be to reach out to an advocacy program that helps survivors of sexual assault and domestic violence. Offer them a curriculum to not just learn how to defend themselves if they were ever in that situation again but to try to help them regain a sense of security. Help them feel comfortable being out in public again because they feel comfortable in the fact that they're no longer a victim.

I'd be really interested in seeing some of your material if you don't mind sharing? I think this is an amazing cause that doesn't get enough focus.

[Jessica Doke]

Jessica, I love your idea! Something I've thought about for awhile now but haven't brought up to my instructor (mainly because I'm a white belt) would be to reach out to an advocacy program that helps survivors of sexual assault and domestic violence. Offer them a curriculum to not just learn how to defend themselves if they were ever in that situation again but to try to help them regain a sense of security. Help them feel comfortable being out in public again because they feel comfortable in the fact that they're no longer a victim.
I'd be really interested in seeing some of your material if you don't mind sharing? I think this is an amazing cause that doesn't get enough focus.

Yes, of coarse. Just message me your email and I will send it to you. If you have no experience working with victim you need to if that is you target audience because their is a ton to know. I've been helping out with woman's advocacy (I have a standing job offer as an attorney when I finish law school), the domestic abuse center in Florence and women's hope center. You definitely need a female to teach this coarse because having a man touching on victims is inappropriate and irresponsible because it can trigger rape trauma syndrome. I am teaching the seminar as a white belt only because we have no ranked female's at our gym and I'm the female with the most experience at my gym and I will have a higher belt supervising me while I teach the techniques. So if there is a rank female at your gym that is probably who you want to talk to along with your coach/head instructor.

[Jessica Doke]

Max - The article I linked to is very long and repeats itself a lot, but the general thing I picked up from it is that the main threat to women is not being attacked by stranger in a dark alley, but being manipulated into something 'bad' or a bad situation by a man they already know - who may be a family member, friend or even martial arts instructor. No BJJ technique will save her here, we're in the realm of psychology and the mind, and dealing with predators and their manipulative behaviours, the expectations of society on females, etc..... I don't know how you teach defence to that in a jiujitsu seminar...

Jessica - good point that the article never mentions at any time that the student has a responsibility to own the material, rather than just take everything the martial arts instructor tells them as gospel. The modern trend is to avoid "victim blaming" in our response to sexual assaults - i.e. "why tell women to be more careful, why not just teach men not to rape!". This is a valid response to daft things people say like "she asked for it because she was drunk", however the flip side of this is that the pendulum has swung too far the other way and it's no longer socially unacceptable (on the Internet at least) to say that people should assume any responsibility for their own behaviour at all. Fact is, if you keep doing risky things, bad things will happen eventually. There needs to be more balance in respect to personal responsibility vs not blaming the victim. Hope that gives you some ideas for your seminar

Yeah I always tell people to be as safe as possible but not to the extent that it prohibits you from living your life. For example if you like party well, then go party but you can still be safe by getting a DD ahead of time, watching the person who makes your drink (a lot of assaults with the aid of drugs are from bartenders!), and not letting it out of your sight and staying in a crowded area or going to the bathroom with a friend (yes that's the real reason girls do that) and still have a great time. You can take responsibility for your own safety without have to give up things you enjoy. Thanks for all your insight!

[Jessica Doke]

@maxmarkov damn dude over here with a better rebuttal than most prosecutors lol. Yeah great point the "red flags" are the same no matter if the attacker is known or unknown. For example not hanging out in deserted areas (from unit 1: avoid, section A: identifying place were potential threats may arise from my seminar) this could be an alley but it could also be the office after everyone leaves for a lunch break. Both are equally dangerous but in one senerio the attacker is a stranger but in the other it could be your boss who calls you in his office and locks the door. Nice point. Also most of this is just a starting point and I'll continue to develop this seminar in to a program and far more in dept (this is just like self defense 101 an entry level coarse). Thank you.

[maxmarkov]

I forgot to mention: the right shoes matter too. You'll obviously run faster with sneakers than with high heels. High endurance and strong legs are advantageous aswell.

[TaylorWolf]

Git it girl