What do you do if a person in your gym wants to roll with you but u don’t? He is a good person but goes %100 all the time with his whole heavy weight ignorantly and o think it is dangerous for me.
Printable View
What do you do if a person in your gym wants to roll with you but u don’t? He is a good person but goes %100 all the time with his whole heavy weight ignorantly and o think it is dangerous for me.
There is nothing rude about "Sorry, I want to stick with guys closer to my size". As a small guy it is imperative for me to wisely choose my rolling partners.
Few ways to deal with this.
1) Approach him after class or address him on the spot like an adult and say I'd like to roll with you but it's challenging with the intensity he goes and the majority of the time that precludes you guys from training. Suggest a flow roll at first, then build from there. Say you don't mind training with him if you guys can modulate the pace day-to-day. ("On a scale of 1-10, 1 being a flow and 10 being a competition roll, let's go at zero intensity. Just move, no resistance. Let's see how this goes.")
2) Simply say 'No thank you' politely with a smile. If his feelings are hurt, it's not like you were rude.
3) Say you've already got a partner, are going to the bathroom, or sitting a round out.
4) This.On that same vein, maybe state "I'm trying to take it easy today. No thanks but I appreciate it. Maybe another time." (genuinely mean that last part).Quote:
Originally Posted by Pat Campagnola
5) Perhaps suggest that you are working on top game or back/mount attacks and would only be down to positionally spar with him, therefore not putting yourself at risk of getting smashed by him. People are usually quite receptive to this alternative.
Throwing the words "My brother" in there I've found usually defuses some of the tension. "No thanks my brother, I'm just trying to go with lighter people for today."
At the end of the day, this training partner is going to have to have a coming to Helio moment about how to become a more desirable training partner. The challenge is to assertively and politely make your point without burning a bridge. Do not accept a roll though at the cost of your health. Your health comes first. Trust me. Take it from a guy that had disc surgery because I refused to turn down rolls with a balls-to-the-wall 320 pound blue belt that politely asked me to roll twice a week for a month before my back gave out. He will figure it out sooner or later or he will risk blackballing himself from the gym entirely. This superheavy training partner of mine had a coming to Helio moment and now we have great flows and I can train with him regularly. If this training partner of yours is indeed a nice guy, do not hesitate to bring it up to him in a friendly and assertive manner that you'd like to train with him but need to figure out alternative ways to do so due to past injuries sustained when training with him. We all need to realize when we are a danger to others. It's a process and just as much a part of our development as, say, an armbar from mount or a guard pass. Do not shy away from a friendly dialogue about becoming more progressive with your training. He will appreciate it in the long run. The big boy I train with made major changes, is currently a purple belt, and his development is tangible. He has become a much more desirable training partner. Obviously this came the hard way after I was forced to have an assertive dialogue post-surgery, but this could have all been avoided if I had overcome my fear of having a somewhat uncomfortable conversation before herniating three discs in my back. Don't let it get to that point. Be kind, direct, compassionate, and you'll get what you're looking for. If he's a good dude, he won't take it personally; he'll simply increase his own body awareness and fight IQ.
I tell them the truth. I have injuries/my body feels weak.. and I am not comfortable rolling with big/explosive people at this point.
About 90% of my jiu-jitsu related injuries come from rolling with heavy explosive guys, especially beginners. I will also refuse to roll with anyone who goes 100% with hell hooks, that is just plainly disrespectful.
Yes, just be honest. Nothing wrong with saying “I can’t afford to get injured rolling with big dudes, I got keeds”
Mannn I am pretty tall but weigh only 170-180. I am firm believer in rolling with all of the biggest and strongest guys to make your game as strong as you can... I'm always looking to roll with the biggest strongest blackbelts. Seriously, if I could roll with a 250 LB with-abs 2nd degree black belt every class that would be IDEAL for me. I am a huge fan of Luke Rockhold in the UFC and I know that a big part of his success is due to training with Cain Velasquez and Daniel Cormier and having them fuckin SMASH his face constantly.
If the particular person is a spazz and is known for injuring opponents then yea maybe avoid him (I still wouldn't avoid that challenge. Also if he were THAT bad I assume the coach would have have already removed him) but please don't prejudge someone based on their size and strength! Big guys need rolls too. ;)
Be straight up about it. Being forward doesn't always mean you're being rude. If you bullshit around the real reason, they will continue to ask you to roll.