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  1. #61
    john botello's Avatar
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    10th Planet JJ Phoenix
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    Mesa, AZ
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    690
    Don't do it

  2. #62

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    Mission: Submissions
    Location
    Mobile, AL
    Posts
    211
    The thing I like about my boyfriend being my teacher is that in the classroom, I am a student and he doesn't treat me any different than he treats everyone else (men and women) that come in there. I grew up wrestling and was always treated like a chick. But he allows me to do what I enjoy and I do the same for him.

    The only downside we have ever encountered is that we are very comfortable with each other and when he is trying to train me one on one, I tend to just run my mouth and don't let him teach a whole lot. I am very anal-ytical at times and the only way for me to sort out my own thoughts is to verbalize it and it aggravates the shit out of him. I really try to learn and do my best and I know that talking is not drilling. I just need to remember that even one on one he is my teacher when it comes to Jiu Jitsu.

    But it has been wonderful for us. Jiu Jitsu is what brought us together.

    The only advice I would give to your guys is that if you have a great chick that either does Jiu Jitsu or supports you in what you love to do, make sure you return the favor and support her in whatever she enjoys as well, no matter how gay or stupid it seems to you. If you expect her to be there and support you and don't do the same for her, she will eventually get sick of it and leave. Just my two cents about that.

    Thanks for the post, Gabby!

  3. #63

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    Rocha BJJ / Gracie Humaita
    Location
    Oakland, CA
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    450
    I've thought about this a lot. My two main questions have generally been: 1) Should I date a girl that does BJJ/MMA? And 2) If so, could she be from my gym?

    On #1, I think the answer is going to end up being yes. It's a huge passion of mine, and I'd like a serious girlfriend to understand it, and hopefully share in enjoying it. Finding a girl who I actually like and who fights is another story.

    For #2, it seems a much bigger issue. At first, when I think about it, it seems like it would be great. You spend time doing what you both enjoy together, it's physical, you're on the same team to route for and help each other ... the list goes on. But I love my gym. I have never had an issue with anybody there, and I feel at home when I show up. I don't want to risk losing that, or ever having to decide whether it's worth going to the gym because I don't want to see someone. Not every breakup is angry, but some are, and almost all end up at the very least awkward. I think I'd probably still make the mistake if the girl was worth it, but I doubt it would be a great idea.

    Sorry, I smoked a bunch before I started writing this is went on a bit of ramble.

  4. #64

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    Carlson Gracie Miami/10P Miami/Ft. Laud Hotbox remnant
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    Miami
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    2,465
    Quote Originally Posted by DENNY PROKOPOS View Post
    It can be a positive or negative, I think it depends on the people involved in the relationship. A very wise man once told me to keep them separate because the gym is your place of peace. And so far I have followed his advice and it's been good for me.
    I agree 100%. If you're going to train jits with your woman, train outside your main jj gym. Romantic relationships at the very core are conflict laden. Plus the normal life cycle of an adult romantic relationship is meet/sexual romantic/breakup. Your dojo/gym/training center should be YOUR time and your training partners' time. I know it's not the Disney Romance attitude, but it's how the world really works. Actively keep your gym a place of peace for the sake of you and your partners.

  5. #65

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    Port City MMA
    Location
    Mobile, Alabama
    Posts
    440
    Quote Originally Posted by Kiko View Post
    I agree 100%. If you're going to train jits with your woman, train outside your main jj gym. Romantic relationships at the very core are conflict laden. Plus the normal life cycle of an adult romantic relationship is meet/sexual romantic/breakup. Your dojo/gym/training center should be YOUR time and your training partners' time. I know it's not the Disney Romance attitude, but it's how the world really works. Actively keep your gym a place of peace for the sake of you and your partners.
    Everybody is different bro. If that's what you believe, then cool but bro I wish I could accurately put into words the kind of relationship! We are like best friends! I know a lot of people say that but I mean it. Actually (as she stated above) we train better in the gym together inside of the gym than outside. I just think (like everything in life) situations are different for everyone. No one scenario is going to dictate the ideal situation for everyone. I just know that with true love (and some help from a higher power) anything is possible. 10th Planet's principal are founded on being open-minded and in my life, that line of thinking reaches out way beyond the philosophies of jiu jitsu. I totally agree with you on the fact that this is real life and 95% of the time, a realationship goes exactly how you explained it above but, BUT.... that still leaves the other 5%. Just think about it my brother and may Jah bless you!

  6. #66

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    Port City MMA
    Location
    Mobile, Alabama
    Posts
    440
    Woops!

    *the kind of relationship that Heidi and myself share!


    Sorry left out some words cuz someone was talking to means I was typing. I'm easily distracted!

  7. #67

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    Carlson Gracie Miami/10P Miami/Ft. Laud Hotbox remnant
    Location
    Miami
    Posts
    2,465
    Quote Originally Posted by Josh Smith View Post
    Everybody is different bro. If that's what you believe, then cool but bro I wish I could accurately put into words the kind of relationship! We are like best friends! I know a lot of people say that but I mean it. Actually (as she stated above) we train better in the gym together inside of the gym than outside. I just think (like everything in life) situations are different for everyone. No one scenario is going to dictate the ideal situation for everyone. I just know that with true love (and some help from a higher power) anything is possible. 10th Planet's principal are founded on being open-minded and in my life, that line of thinking reaches out way beyond the philosophies of jiu jitsu. I totally agree with you on the fact that this is real life and 95% of the time, a realationship goes exactly how you explained it above but, BUT.... that still leaves the other 5%. Just think about it my brother and may Jah bless you!
    If you're going to roll the dice my brother, I hope you're in that 5% =D. And may Jah Rule bless you too =D.

  8. #68

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    Port City MMA
    Location
    Mobile, Alabama
    Posts
    440
    Quote Originally Posted by Kiko View Post
    If you're going to roll the dice my brother, I hope you're in that 5% =D. And may Jah Rule bless you too =D.
    Me too. I rolled it about a year & a half ago & we're still going strong! I hope to continue for many more...

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