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  1. #11
    Tori Applegate's Avatar
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    10th Planet Gulf Shores
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    I think it's great, but I think it's even better when you're married. I was already married to Sean when I started jiu jitsu and he also is my coach so some people find that weird. But it helps me with my aggression to do jiu jitsu and compete, also it just constantly makes me work on myself and try to be a better person. When you have two people in a relationship doing that, I think it makes things work for the better. Also, like anyone, I respect my coach..you should respect your husband..so sometimes I have to swallow my pride on things, but its on things that I should, ya know. Also, I'm not bored. I don't feel like a very clingy wife because of it. I have a hobby. Now Sean isn't my partner in everything we go to, seminars, training camps, whatever, but i rep with whoever. I like everyone i train with. I have a ton of people I like and are like family at the gym. There's nothing better and I wouldn't give it up for anything. It's not for every woman, some really dislike it, but for me personally I feel like its been just what I needed and I'm glad Sean kept pushing me to keep trying it. It's nice too, I never feel like he doesn't support me. He's very encouraging with my training and competing. When I make goals and then possibly slack, he reminds me of them again. It's a great set up. :-)
    Be one with yourself and know you can do anything when you are friends with yourself.


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  2. #12

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    10th Planet Los Angeles
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    USA
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    26
    Quote Originally Posted by HerbChao View Post
    I had a similar experience too a couple years back with a female teammate (at the time) at one of the gyms I would train at. While we were together it was wicked cool to train together and talk jiu jitsu and martial arts, and we had 50 mutual friends too through the gym and jiu jitsu. When the relationship ended it was def a different spot for me (and maybe for her too) to be in sharing so many mutual friends and (for me at least on this part) hold conversations and not being sure whether to mention each other's names. Since then she's gotten pregnant and is winding down the last trimester, a couple of my instructors and friends at that gym have left too so we don't have that "awkward" dynamic as much anymore. I guess in your case hopefully at some point that feels less awkward too, and you both can look back and appreciate the time you both had together and that the rest of the training partners there don't have to feel like they're caught in the middle either.

    But I def feel ya, like anything in life there's always a risk and reward factor. With some time since the ending of that relationship for me to process things, I can't say I would go out of my way to want to do that again with wanting to have a future dating partner train too, but if the opportunity presents itself I'd say we can all benefit from the exercise and self defense knowledge.
    Buddy, it's a real treasure to train with the girl you're dating with. It makes your relationship stronger, and it even leads to the stronger love... For example, I had such experience with my ex (she was from Africa), but, she left me as I was concentrated too much on my tranings, so, guys, don't forget about the fact that you should take care of the girl you're dating with...

  3. #13

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    10th Planet New York
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainstorm214 View Post
    Buddy, it's a real treasure to train with the girl you're dating with. It makes your relationship stronger, and it even leads to the stronger love... For example, I had such experience with my ex (she was from Africa), but, she left me as I was concentrated too much on my tranings, so, guys, don't forget about the fact that you should take care of the girl you're dating with...
    wow, buddy, that's great! To be honest, my friend has almost the same story, as he trained together with his girlfriend that was from Africa too, lol, that's a coincidence... By the way, they are really happy living together now, and it's not surprising, as he carefully searched for the future wife. He checked a lot of forums, blogs and articles to find the best wife with a suitable behavior... And you know what? The article about how to find african mail order brides was the thing that convinced him search for girlfriend from Africa, as they're compassionate and fair, and girl that my friend found possessed the same qualities

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