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Ok so, in about 8 hours time i'm going to face my fate, i read in one the ufc magazines about Kyle Noke's journey e.t.c and his experiance with Steve Irwin and the fact his wrestling and strength would have allowed him to dominate the UFC....
so high as fuck i spoke to a friend who works about an hour south of where i live and begged to join him down the most crocodile infested river in australia and catch some with him...
fuck
hahaha:o
Yeah you fucked up. That shit happens when your high and contemplating about the world. Most of the time when that happens to me I smoke until I think of something else. LMAO!
lmao i could have used your wisdom during that call... wish i hadn't researched crocs in my area and the opening line was
"The Saltwater Crocodile has a large head strong jaws and lots very sharp pointed teeth. It can grow up to 7 meters long and can weigh over 1000 kg"
LMAO your in for it now!!
I know this feeling I got a wee bit drunk at a pub and decided to dive with sharks one day stupid dam aquarium and there shark diving
hahaha ^^^ you survived though!! i'll keep that in mind haha the great whites in W.A are fucking ridiculously scary...
Those crocs are no joke sir remember Top jaw rope On hooks in hands over the eyes
you should be worried bro... crocs are not a joke.. hehe
^^ haha i'm shitting myself i just took 10mg of valium to try put myself to sleep and get a little rest in and it isn't working haha i'm thinking i'm just gonna pump six or seven cones re read the article think how bad i want to be a world champion and then let stupidity and thc take over lol
....and this was the last post by ashley woods, in memory
RIP Ashley Woods
haha glad to know i would have been missed!!
i got there just before the sun rose, trying to shake off the valium which was insisting i continue to sleep!!
we did some stretching, took some pills to supposedly fight off any disease we may catch from mosquito's e.t.c around the mangroves and then they took me through a safety briefing which in hindsight i wish i'd paid attention a little more carefully... we then had a "practice" run on a tamed crocodile at the farm... this eased my nerves alot and was moderatley easy to control...again i should have paid closer attention to the "tamed" part....
6 of us hop on a boat and off down the river we go... i spark up my pre-prepared xo cognac flavoured blunt and relax taking in the nature e.t.c shit was pretty peaceful, about 20 minutes in we've spotted our first catch... i put out the blunt... and pay close attention.... being the "newbie" guess who gets to attack the jaw first? yup yup... and in a moment i like to call spontaneous bravery... like that second of bravery that helps you jump out of a plane when skydiving prior to the flow of urine that runs down your leg following hahaha
i dive on SPLASH i forget all the prior instructions and apply a RNC to the crocs jaws...without the hooks obviously....and although it felt like an eternity due to adrenaline and a mad blunt...2 seconds i was on there for before the croc without prior warning rolls... the croc was 4ft long and weighed in at 600kg's.... i was flung into the air then the water... panic kicked in i've got a pissed off dinosaur with me it's prey disorientated and in the crocs element not to mention how many could have been watching this spectactle.... i rush to the surface dive on the boat fast as fuck to find everybody curled around the floor of the boat pissing themselves laughing....then come the taunts "nice jiu jitsu dickhead" (they all stab needles in their ass and lift weights and could give 2 fucks about martial arts and thought i was a retard for joining them)
after this i was put on tail duty for the next 3 and i came home early in embarrassment lol.....
maybe next time i'll just practice in the farm on the tames.... fucking steve irwin lol
are you fucking serious you really wrestled a crock? you've got to be fucking kidding me man you are my hero.
lol technically i wrestled 5 hahaha.... one intoxicated tame one.... the one that almost had me for breakfast and then 3 tails haha
bring a 12 guage
nothing will happen
lol shoot a crocodile and he'll eat you for waking him up lol
shit id make purses and boots out of that sum bitch real quick