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  1. #1
    Ric's Avatar
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    Marcelo Garcia Academy, NYC
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    491

    Guys I Can't Train With

    Inspired by Adam Corolla, here's my list of Guys I Can't Roll With

    1) The Let's Just Roll Light Guy: He's the one who says he just wants to go light, but then builds to 100% strength attack while you're still rolling at 10%.

    2) The Everybody Look At My Balls Guy: He's the one who refuses to wear Gi pants or MMA shorts. Instead he wears wide legged Muay Thai shorts that show his entire nut sac everytime he pulls guard. He loves showing as much skin as possible when he's rolling with another male. Go figure.

    3) The Advice Column Guy: This is the guy who taps you and pretends to offer helpful advice, but in reality he's just bragging that he tapped you. Instead of saying something like, "Let me show you how I'm able to sweep you and how to avoid it," he says stuff like, "Dude you can't leave that arm out there, cause if you do I'm going to trap it every single time." He's also fond of saying, "Dude, you need to relax and breathe more when you're rolling." Fuck you, douchebag.

    4) The Wrestler Who Doesn't Want to Learn BJJ Guy: He wrestled all through college and won some local championships. He comes to BJJ under the pretense of learning BJJ, but he's really here because now that he has graduated there's nowhere to practice wrestling. BJJ is the closest thing he can find. He barrels in like a bull every time he rolls and uses the same submission every single time -generally something basic like an Americana. He never attempts to fight from his back and because he can tap you with a wrestling move, he never thinks to ask you to show him an actual BJJ technique.

    5) The Name Dropper Dude: He just happens to be wearing shorts or a rash guard from some school other than the one he trains at and acts like he doesn't know it. He's just waiting and praying every day for someone to ask him about it so he can say, "Yeah, I rolled with Rickson a couple of times. He's a cool dude." This is the one I'm guilty of when I'm wearing the 10th Planet shorts at Marcelo's academy... "Yeah, I met Eddie last summer. Cool dude."

  2. #2
    Agreed Ric. I Always get shit when i when my shorts with a 10th planet patch and i have to say im slightly Guilty of the last one as well.
    "If you believe, then you have already taken the first step towards your achievement."

    Rickson Gracie



    www.Primate-Fitness.com

  3. #3

    Array

    School
    10th Planet Rochester
    Location
    Rochester, New York
    Posts
    1,080
    I like the something hurts everytime you roll guy

  4. #4
    Bill Keeling's Avatar
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    School
    Hoosier Fight Club
    Location
    Louisville, KY/ Southern Indiana
    Posts
    1,198
    I am guilty of the last one as well. But in my defense after I train with someone a few times. I have usually created a re-pore with them and lucky enough to call many of them friends. But when I talk about said friends, it always feels like name dropping...
    6. hurts guy^
    7. guy that has no clue and is no where close to having a sub and puts 110% of their entire body into nothing! IE: Had a white belt with about 50 lbs on me, letting him work some back attacks, while I defended. Neck and chin protected, he continues to wrench his forearm into my mouth to the point I could feel my teeth sinking in to his skin. Yet I still had to tell him "dude you crank any harder and my teeth are going to cut you" Cause I did not want anyone's blood straight in my mouth! Me and BJ do not share that habit

  5. #5

    Array

    School
    10th Planet Vista
    Location
    San Diego
    Posts
    296
    I hate the guy that thinks every time you roll is a street fight, you dont learn nothing and he dont learn nothing.

  6. #6

    Array

    School
    Lincoln Brazilian Jiu Jitsu Center
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    393
    Seems like you should listen to the number three guy. There are way worse people than that.

  7. #7
    hahaha funny but i agree with you man.

  8. #8

    Array

    School
    Jay Pages Jiu-Jitsu/CTA
    Location
    Tempe, AZ
    Posts
    142
    Awesome list! All gyms have each and every one of those guys!

  9. #9

    Array

    School
    10th Planet
    Location
    Nibiru
    Posts
    327
    i hate every roll session is abu dhabi night guy

  10. #10

    Array

    School
    Summit City Submissions/ Black Market Brazilian Jiu Jitsu
    Location
    Fort Wayne
    Posts
    700
    I'm pretty sure I've been all of those guys except the first one and I've had fun rolling with all of them. Why do you have to be so elitist about who you roll with? People will never change unless you try and open their minds a little and shape their opinions of what they should be by being cool yourself.

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